#notes from the word page
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I am happy to say that most of the stores I usually frequent are Canadian owned! I may need to find a new place to buy yarn though.
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THE GLORIA SCOTT - part 2, and a follow up to my comic for the first half of this scene! thanks sm to @crashingmeteorz for allowing me to source validation for my whimsical cosmic approach to this moment <3
#sherlock & co#sherlock and co#i had such a distinct and vivid image for this scene in my mind when i first considered drawing it#but i was worried people might find it. too weird?? but . i dont want to draw 13 pages of two men lying on a bed#so heres my heavy visual metaphor for the ways in which i think john and sherlock are trying to connect with each other in this scene#i hope it makes sense!#i have so many feelings about this scene i cant put it into words so it had to be a comic instead#another note i was already working on this when joff's floorplan released and i didnt want to reshuffle the entire composition to conform#wouldnt have worked#but future comics will take the canon floorplan into account#uhmm#oh yeah also wanted to mention: i took inspiration from Space Boy the webcomic. so. read that if u vibe with this kind of storytelling#another thing: sleep well by electric president - tracks 4 5 and 6#patsart
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It's such good enrichment!
He's gotten pretty good at pushing it around with his nose. His problem is mostly that he will push it into a corner and get it stuck; at which point, I pull it out and roll it to let some kibble out. I was surprised by how quickly he learned that sticking his tongue in the hole wasn't going to work. However, it does take quite a while to get two cups of food out of a little hole.
I got big dog one of those kong puzzle feeders that he has to roll around to get kibbles out and it was a lot of fun watching him figure it out. I only let him work at it for 20 minutes before I opened it and dumped his food in a dish, because I didn't want him to get frustrated, but that's still 10× his normal meal speed
yesssssss they are so good. puzzle feeders are really fun for both watching and intervening!
If you want him to get good at it, let him be a little frustrated as long as he's still engaged with the toy and willing to poke at it! sometimes they need a little bit of support to get the core basic concept (as with the Tug-A-Jugs I have for example) but once they have the idea it's pretty fun.
expect him to learn to yeet those kong wobblers into the wall though. that's the natural end stage for 'em in my experience... because if you fling 'em hard enough they scatter kibble everywhere.
#I know i would be frustrated if I were used to eating all at once and I was switched to one tiny bite at a time#but that's probably projecting#I will have to try giving him longer with it#interactions#notes from the word page#also thank goodness he's not food possessive#it makes it easy to help him get the feeder out of corners#he tends to become mischievous in the evenings#so I was hoping feeding his supper this way would help provide an outlet for that
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Giving kudos to myself for making my depressing ass Lan Zhan spotify playlist entitled ✨️Thirteen Years✨️ because I have been doing The Not Good™️ because of work, and the playlist really do get me through the morning
#AND ALL ALONG I BELIEVED I WOULD FIND YOUUUU#HAVING SO MUCH TO SAY AND WATCHING YOU WALK AWAYYY#I WISH THAT I COULD WAKE UP WITH AMNESIA#dude i went to the 5sos show last summer mid reading book 3 AND LET ME TELL YOU out of body experience#YOUR LOVE IS MY TURNING PAGE#ONCE I WAS THE GREAT HOPE FOR A DYNASTY CROWDS WOULD HANG ON MY WORDS AND THEY TRUSTED ME#i only liked castles crumbling when my brain wangxianed it the hayley verse is most wangxian#on a related unrelated side note marjorie is unbelievably chengxian coded and i cry everytime#if it wasnt clear the all caps are song lyrics from the playlist#mdzs#lan zhan#lan wangji#wei ying#wei wuxian#wangxian#berry agenda rise
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hazuki is a wild character (at least to me) in the sense that he was in literally only 2 scenes, one of which very short, and he feels so insanely important to the plot in a way where i desperately want to write about him but we have so very little info that i feel as though i am scraping up bread crumbs that are crushed into the earth for a semblance of something to work with
#zircon rambles#twewy#neo twewy#hazuki mikagi#aka i accidentally made him a big part of testplayer and i am suffering for it#the AMOUNT OF NOTES i have on this man#i literally fuckin#re-translated a couple parts of neo *myself* using Japanese i have not studied for *years*#having to rely on my poor listening skills and literally write down what i hear from the voice lines for one of them#Because i dont have the japanese script of the game#Just to try and understand this stupid bitch from every angle#Not that i dont trust the localization i just was like#'I gotta dig into the original too so i can see if that gives me better insight'#im like going insane send help#the way testplayer has 60 pages of canon cited notes alone... hazuki is like. 3 of those pages. At least. Maybe 5#the fic itself is over 90k words now#i have not worked this hard on a project in so long its kind of cathartic im ngl
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oh btw i finally started translating a matteo interview i've been meaning to translate for like 2 months. it's gonna take me a long fucking time bc it's around 1h long and the hardest part is not even translating it it's making subtitles lol. and the reward will be maybe 5 notes on here but <3 spreading the matteo is a funny down to earth sweetheart who deserves the world agenda to even just one person will be worth it. also i always think that i want to get better at translating so it's good practice
#translating is so hard for me. tbh. like knowing what something means is very different from knowing how to say it in my other language#my mind works in like. a more visual way. when it comes to languages. when i hear a word that i know i picture the thing in my brain#the word for it in the other language? good luck finding it in there#and this is very fascinating to me bc i'm also very much a visual memory kind of guy when i study#in school i used to picture the text book page with the info in my brain. or even better the page in my notes#BUT. what's fascinating is that i can't visualise book descriptions in my brain for shit. i've never been able to picture what a character#looks like. i read the descriptions but in my mind it's just a blur of a person 😭😭#i still need to analyse all of this more bc on first instinct it seems weird to me that visualising things in my brain is my way to go for#learning and for knowing languages. but then i have to picture something i'm being given specific descriptions of and my brain can't do it#fascinating.#sorry i went off topic#but then again when do i ever stay on topic in my tags#matteo interview. i hope some of you will be interested 😭😭#nico rambles
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I'm about halfway to two thirds through You Feel It Just Below the Ribs, and asdjasdlkajsadjal
The reveals, the implications, I can't even - mentally I'm rolling on the floor frothing at the mouth. I want to go back and listen to season 3 and season 1 all over again, holy shiiiiit
#viv18chatter#within the wires#you feel it just below the ribs#bless my library for having such a great collection#did not expect to find a book written for an alternative history podcast in its repertoire#but have it they did! all three versions I might add - physical digital and audio#anyways point is shit is really coming out now and I am loving the fictional tea#both from the ''actual'' autobiography and the side implications of the footnotes and interludes#well in between wanting to shake the fictional authors of said footnotes and interludes lol#''edited for clarity'' edited HOW? Was the writing smudged or otherwise unclear and you made your best guess?#did you change words around that YOU thought didn't make sense?#TELL ME WHAT WAS EDITED DAMMIT#and that's not even getting into the VERY opinionated footnotes and interludes#I know it would be expensive and tricky to make#but man I would love if the authors were able to make a special edition of this book#that looked like the actual manuscript#or like ... the one that was released in-universe that was being beta'd by the publishers - so we see the handwritten pages with smudges#the faded typewriter pages#with the publishers notes etc all over it#oooh stretch goal of the internal communications while going over the manuscript would prbably be a fun aside too#sometimes I wonder if there weren't multiple people making footnotes (though only one making the interludes I think)#because sometimes they vary quite wildly in tone#that could just be situational of course#but still#interesting thoughts
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Books of 2024: June Wrap-Up.
Okay, y'all have Convinced Me--I'm going to start doing little wrap up posts! Behold: a shelf of what I read in June (not pictured: the bookmark at page 466 of ORDINARY MONSTERS, because despite having read two (2) books worth of book so far, I'm still not quite done with that one).
June was kind of a slow reading month for me (I did a LOT of writing, looking back--nice). I wanted to take OTHER TERRORS and THE ELEMENTS OF ELOQUENCE a bite at a time so the horrors and figures of rhetoric (respectively) didn't all run together. Both of those, much like A SHINING, turned out to be pleasantly leisurely wanders, whereas MONSTERS is kind of a plod.
I already did bigger write-ups for TERRORS and SHINING, linked in the bullets below.
OTHER TERRORS - ★★★★ Great bite-sized horror anthology with a really inclusive mix, as promised! I enjoyed most of these (always nice in an anthology!)
A SHINING - ★★★★ Weird fucked up heavy little book in translation, lit-fic flavored, but very approachable, I thought. Tiny enough to swallow in a sitting, but also kind of exhausting to do it that way? I'll definitely reread this one in the future.
THE ELEMENTS OF ELOQUENCE - ★★★ Fun romp through rhetoric! The examples were fun, and I appreciated the humor, but I also find myself still uncertain what a bunch of the figures actually ARE, definitions-wise, despite having read a book full of so many of them (I did just buy his recommended A HANDLIST OF RHETORICAL TERMS to help with that, at least, which is. almost entirely. definitions by volume). Neat thing to have on my references shelf, but it wasn't as excellent as I was hoping it'd be.
ORDINARY MONSTERS - 466/658 pages read; will report back later (but it's not looking good, folks).
#books of 2024#books of 2024: june wrap-up#other terrors#a shining#the elements of eloquence#ordinary monsters#jon fosse#mark forsyth#jm miro#is this anything??#i don't actually usually rate things on GR if they're not 4/5#(rarely 1/2)#i almost never rate 3s#so i pulled the 4 stars from my goodreads but made up ELOQUENCE after the fact#also ordinary monsters does NOT need to be this long holy fuck#anyway i finished writing a novella at the end of may#wrote a short story at the beginning of june#spent a weekend in a hotel making Liminal Space Notes for revision purposes#and then spent a week picking at that scene at the end of june#had a great time on the writing front#it does in fact mean words goes slower though#oh heck i'm also partway through alpha reading a friend's manuscript too huh#that's not on my Read In June but i read like 40 pages of that so far XD
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the book of bill is interesting because you cant take any of it at face value
#beep boop#gravity falls#mystery posting#spoilers in tags#like i think the only things in it that are 100% true is the ending and the notes from ford / the rest of the pines family . everything else#needs to be taken with a grain of salt#those journal 3 pages might be fake . bill is straight up lying about most of his backstory#the whole premise is that he wants you to keep reading ! that hes tempting you specifically with things you want to know !#like i think parts of the journal 3 pages did happen#but ford didnt actually write about it#this book is fun to think about because of bills tendency to lie and just make shit up#anyway this was rambly ive been trying to put my thoughts about this book into tangible words#i did enjoy it for the most part . i just hope people arent weird about certain parts
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I think I need to actually break the oc fic apart into multiple google docs bc seeing the entire thing in one spot may or may not be intimidating me out of working on it
#there's a lot in the note doc and i think bc there's so much it's making it harder for me to pare down what i want#started writing at work and i think starting a piece from a clean page helped so. might approach this a little differently#not home rn but when i am and have internet i might run what's here through a word counter#there's lots of notes and placeholders and those are a little unavoidable but i can get a rough estimate at least#shai speaks
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Every therapist I've ever had: You need to be less hard on yourself! Learn to take pride in your accomplishments!
Me: What accomplishments?*
Them: Literally anything that was hard for you! Was it hard to get out of bed this morning? That's an accomplishment. Did you have a shower today? Did you brush your teeth before bed? Those are accomplishments!
Me: Sounds fake but okay.
#notes from the word page#anxious spirals#*I literally have two degrees#I have things to be proud of#but it's just so hard to not focus on how I could have done better#getting my first degree didn't feel like an accomplishment because I was barely scraping good enough grades to graduate#getting my second degree somewhat felt like an accomplishment#but more in that I put a lot of work into my practicums#the degree itself and the coursework didn't always feel like things I should be proud of#sometimes they did#but then I went into the job market sending out a ton of applications and getting no responses#one of the best pieces of positive feedback I got from my last principal was that I gave very good feedback to my students#but that didn't really feel like an accomplishment#because when I started he said the teacher I was replacing did well with the school's feedback model#so I just based what I was doing on what she had done#it did feel like acknowledgement of what had often felt like pointlessly hard work#and maybe I need to tease out the fact that acknowledgement and accomplishment have such different definitions in my mind#but anyways#to get back to the celebrating tiny wins thing#I just find it so hard to celebrate something that other people do easily!#(this may be where I have to come to terms that yes adhd is a disability and yes that means things are harder than they are for other peopl#oops)
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just a few little bits from the past few days
#both the word count screenshots are from the same day - just different sections of the text. so that was like 4000 words in#one DAY.. huzzah!! (< making up for the fact that I did 0 words the 3 days before that lol.. so its not actually an accomplishment ghjjh)#In renpy I think you can have multiple separate texty cody whatever documents and still jump between them so long as they;re#labeled properly. Rather than like... having one extremely long 60.000 line file where in some places youre in a menu within a menu#within a menu within a menu within a menu within a menu within a menu jhbhj#But that was the way I started doing it lke 5 years ago when I actually made the base of everything so I feel like it'd be too much#work to change it all that dramatically now. But that means I cant just get the word count for the whole document I just have#to jump around to the few sections I worked on and highlight them to get the word count for only that portion#.. the one tiny fraction of the whole monster text wall. Though it is of course spaced out and organized into#clearly labeled sections within that because otherwise I have trouble discerning text on a screen. still.#Resuming a project that's been basically abandoned for 4-5 ish years is just always finding weird stuff like.. why did I do this that way..#why did I write that... why did I organize that in this manner... what the hell am I referencing in this note... etc. lol#Anyway... also......................cat with plum on his head.#everyone point and laugh at mr. plum head boy..!!!!!!!!!!!!! >:3c#I've been obsessed with Calico Critters' social media presence from afar (like how I mentioned one of my possible dream jobs would#be to be the person that sets the scenes and arranges all the toy animals at a tiny little table and etc. to take the type of pictures they#post on their facebook page and stuff) and I see all their photos of them posing the rabbits as if they're in a swimming pool#or on a nature hike or etc. etc. BUT I have never really seen them in person. Recently I was at a store (in a KN95 mask and not staying#very long still of course. wastewater covid levels are still high where I live (and most of the US truly)) and it just crossed my mind#to actually go to the toy section and see if I could find any....wow.... Its like meeting a celebrity.. the Latte Cats....#Of course I didnt buy them because they're like... very expensive?? like $25 - $40 just for one little pack of a few critters like#what is shown. but.... I still got to see them................ my beloved.. I want their outfits... T o T#Oh and then lastly just a pot of purple clover looking things. I just think theyre neat lol#photo diary
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Oh look - it's him the Whole!
I think I prefer Whole as a concept more than a character, and I've certainly thought of that more. However, it doesn't mean I dislike the idea of Whole as a character. There's a lot of cool and interesting interpretations and as usual - people are really creative. Though I wasn't thinking too hard through my album listens about Whole as a character which is why it lingered with me but I didn't have too many of my own thoughts.
. And then I started listening to Pathological Facade by GHOST AND PALS again which led to something really clicking. So I've drawn Whole!! Tbf I actually have drawn him before in my sketchbook 'cause of another song I was listening to but the lyrics are me kiind of stretching it? I'll see what I do with it later - though I wanted to share these ones I did since like I said before - traditional drawing and digital feel different for me and it'd been a while. There aren't a lot but I like 'em!
[More ramblings under the cut 'cause this is getting long]
I just knew I wanted him to have a fusion (the word I intended to use but hadn't noticed until now???) of some elements in my HMS designs hair and face wise. And while I only have two frame redraws from the video (which are my favorite frames btw), it's something I've been thinking of a lot 'and... hope I can better articulate? . Although the lyrics really made me think of that 'cause I think about the lyrics of Pathological Facade a lot 'cause of its lyrics...
Although who knows - I want to finish the second drawing as something more fully-fledged but I have like... a few other WIPs and ideas I'd like done before the end of the year just personally before I start something new. I think this doodle looks really nice on its own though - I had fun drawing it. That song's really good.
#Chonny Jash#CCCC#CCCC fanart#Chonny's Charming Chaos Compendium#CJ Whole#CJ Soul#And a cameo from Heart and Mind at least symbolically?#Tori's Doodles of Mellarky#I think about these guys so much but my brain is faster than my hands#So I don't draw as fast as I could as I'm always thinking of misc stuff. Some of that being new stuff before I even draw things#You guys have no idea how much these guys take up my brain rn#I could probably fix that if I drew in my sketchbook more (still gotta fill in pages) - or even showed more of my notes like this#Idk! just some tag rambling for anyone whose reading :p I'm having fun drawing CCCC stuff at least#Also I can't get through one of these without some kind of wording error on my part
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Anon from earlier about Sam's family. Thanks for letting me know that tribe was an offensive term for the Aboriginal people. I'm not Australian and didn't know. I apologize. And yes, people were using that term on twitter when talking about it. It's all in very bad faith.
(x)
You're very welcome, anon, and I appreciate the acknowledgement. I figured it was probably the terminology being used, and you just didn't know, but it's really kind of you to own it, apologise and be open to learning.
I'm kind of a bit lucky in this sense, because I have a few Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander friends from across different Nations, and I work with a lot of First Nations people in different capacities (actors, writers and artists at the theatre company, of course, but one of my areas of specialisation as a freelance writer is in people-related safety, so I have a - - mm, I don't want to say expertise, because I think this is a space you're always learning in, but perhaps an area of qualification (?) in writing about child safety, gender-based safety in the workplace, and racial and cultural safety, particularly with First Nations people, in which I usually work with Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples to develop documents on what helps them to feel safe in different contexts. I've written these sorts of things for schools, health services and arts venues, so I have a lot of conversations with people in different capacities too. I'm also on the theatre I work at's Reconciliation Action Working Group, so yes! Having a lot of robust conversations every day, haha).
But yeah. It's quite telling to me that someone would stress a level of 'care' over what happened to those First Nations people while using a term that many Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples would consider a slur. To do that level of research into a family Sam could possibly be related to, and then to weaponise a community while calling that community something they'd find derogatory just makes it beyond obvious what the intentions behind it are. It would take two minutes to look up any of the many, many guides that exist about this, but those communities aren't who they actually care about. They're just grist for the mill.
#okay typing this up to hopefully help people identify this if it comes up in further convos#especially because sam works with Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples quite a bit here (including getting directed by my beloved#Leah Purcell in The Drover's Wife! and also there being a story on newsreader#with one of my fave aus actors right now [who's half Aboriginal Australian half Black American] Hunter Page-Lochard)#some things worth noting:#the term 'abo' is the equivalent of saying the n-word#Do Not Use It and if you see non-Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people using it - call them out#also most Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples do not like being abbrevited generally or reduced to an acronym#the people i speak to often find the BIPOC descriptor as harmful and reducing of their Indigenity and connection to country (aka homeland)#Australia has a 'First Nations First' movement#which is about trying to put First Peoples first in discussion events (hopefully one day) politics etc#which obviously BIPOC as an acronym seconds Indigenity to Blackness#this is not a criticism of the acronym in other countries just an acknowledgement it doesn't always work here especially with#Aboriginal people who don't identify as Blak#'AATSI' and 'ATSI' have also been considered deeply DEEPLY offensive by literally anyone i have ever spoken to about terminology#so please don't do that#the best thing you can do is acknowledge a specific community nation#so let's use Leah as an example since I've just mentioned her#she's a wonderful Aboriginal Australian playwright filmmaker and actress#but she's also a Goa-Gungarri-Wakka Wakka Murri woman#which she has talked about and posted about publicly#if Aboriginal Australian people have their communities and nations in their bio's like that#you should use them and feel empowered to do so#there are over 250 Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander communities still living in Australia#(halved from around 500 due to colonisation)#acknowledge the specific communities and nations where you can!#that said#people might refer to themselves as 'Blak' (Black without the C)#as a collective term#or just Aboriginal Australian
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I'm so glad Dean saved my extremely long and detailed vampire lore document because I would've been really upset if I lost that
#🫀.words#he copied and pasted it from my tumblr into a notes doc#shout-out to him for making sure that shit was secured before he deactivated my page to flee from my ex
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Me: surely it's not chronic fatigue if I can push through it given sufficient motivation
Me: *remembers this post from @/thebibliosphere*
Me: ...
Me: I really hope there's not a wall in my near future to crash into and burn up against
#notes from the word page#I'm tired of being tired#the crappy thing is that i have a documented medical reason to be exhausted#I guess I just need to advocate a little harder to get something else done about it#at any rate only one more week till school's out and I can rest a bit#just a bunch of marking to get done first
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